Aha. I think I figured it out, which is kind of sad considering how simple it was. But yeah, blue text, blue me. What is there to say? I feel so uninteresting, like I have lost so much of myself. The thing is, I'm not even sure who or what gained the missing pieces of myself. One could relate to the old "less is more" philosophy, but I don't think that is applicable to personality. It's as though the beauty of the world has eclipsed. An eclipse may be temporary, but I fear I've already blinded myself by focusing upon it too intently. That being said, I turned in a job application today. I think I really want this job. It's for an activity aide at the local care center, and it would do me a lot of good to be around people who need their day brightened and someone to take an interest in them and what they do. Anyway, I turned in the application and got an interview on the spot, which I must say went very well. The only problem is that I felt very fake, even though I was being myself. I feel like I just sounded too positive and too confident to be real. How do I fake it so well? It's not like I lied to the woman or anything, and everything I said was true. Perhaps it was the question, "How would you describe yourself?" that caught me off-guard, and yeah, anyone trying to get a job is bound to describe herself differently than she would to a best friend, but still...shouldn't I have talked about all my negative qualities, how I really don't think I'm the best thing in the world, that I feel like I hardly deserve to exist right now? And I know that's not the core of my truth. I know I love myself still and all, but I feel so far removed from it that it's almost as if I don't. Also, I wasn't sure whether to check "Yes" or "No" when asked "Do you have a disability?" on the application. I ended up leaving it blank. I mean, I suppose I do? It's documented but not registered, and it's not something I deal with every day...